The two best days of being a boat owner are ‘the day you buy it’ and the ‘day you sell it.’
Others use a similar expression. Like those who have purchased a vacation home they never have time to enjoy. Or that convertible as a full-time car (if you drive in New England). I’ve heard some hackers on the golf course say the same about their Titleist blades.
And it’s been said on many occasions in the PR agency world; on those occasions when a new client turns out to be everything the agency hoped they wouldn’t be – when the two best days are the day the agency wins the client’s business and the day the agency fires that client.
A boat. A second home. A roadster that’s to die for. That shiny new client. All seemed like great ideas at the time. All looked wonderful from the outside. And then the honeymoon ends…and you’re in it for real.
For better or for worse, things we learn in life are often learned through trial and error. While we may try to not repeat the same mistakes over and over (there’s a definition for this type of behavior), we sometimes do.
Unlike the regretful boat owner who is typically one and done, PR agencies have histories of chasing bad client after bad client, deluding themselves into thinking that this time things will be different because they will “control” the relationship and not let the client run roughshod over them.
What do I mean by “bad’ client? Well they come in many shapes, sizes and disguises.
There’s the client whose initial budget is below the agency’s minimum monthly retainer but promises that the budget is going to increase after the first three months or when the next round of funding comes in. Three months come and go … another three months come and go … etc.
There’s the know-it-all client who has never worked with a PR agency before but skimmed the Public Relations for Dummies Cheat Sheet which has a section entitled, “Convincing Editors to Print Your Press Release.” Seriously. This client knows just enough about PR to be dangerous but still doesn’t make the distinction between an article written by an actual journalist and a news release replayed verbatim on one of those free press release web sites.
Of course, there’s the client working at his third start-up, the first two of which had successful exits and were media darlings and who is expecting and demanding the same level of media interest for his also-ran entry into the dying market du jour.
And finally, there’s the worse client type of all: the one who hires you and then disappears expecting the PR program to run smoothly without them having to pay any attention to it now that a firm has been hired. You know the type … they make a living of hiring and firing agencies as a job protection ploy. They blow off weekly check-in meetings, rarely return your phone calls or email pleas for information but are fast to get in your face when their company is left out of a story.
But they are happy to take credit for any positive results the agency does manage to generate. When that happens, it’s time to sell the boat. Don’t you think?